OPPA GANGNAM!!!

 Why people like to dey find my mouth so, ehn?

Life stays giving me plenty gist for y'all without me even trying. Now that I think on it some more, not such a bad deal. Imagine if life were predictable? I'd cry myself to sleep every minute!!!

Anyhoo... Hello darlings!!! It's Tuesday, Yo!!!!! Friday night fever creeping into every pore I possess, makes me want to jump up on my desk and do the quick-step! (No, I don't do the "gangnam". Yet. I'm waiting for either Rih-Rih or Beyonce to "sexify" the dance. I've got an image to preserve. Then again, I saw Heidi do the Gangnam at the EMA’s and she’s as HOT as it gets so I have to learn that dance now, hehe!) Friday is still a couple of days away but don’t blame a girl for being optimistic.

E-hen, back to the gist I want to give you. I got home yesterday evening after a quick stop at Orela Grill to pick up my dinner (mashed potatoes and well-done steak), quickly parked the car and was running to the elevator when a neighbor (Adeola) stopped me and the following conversation ensued:

ADEOLA: "Chickito!!! Just a minute, jor. How now? (Who still says "chickito" btw?)"

 ME: "I'm good, very tired though. Where's the fire? What's up? (This, in a very bored and impatient tone)

 ADEOLA: "Fire ke? (Cackles) hahahaha. You and your humor ehn... You are very funny. There's no fire. You do look very tired. Pele oh, you hear? Sorry."

 ME: "Thank you. What do you want oh, Adeola?"

 ADEOLA: "Oh, Ah yes!! Ermm... Well, I met with some of the other women in the estate this afternoon over lunch."

 Somehow she catches sight of my bag from Orela...

 ADEOLA: "Ah! Orela!!! I like their food so much!!! (You like food, 'Deola. Simple!) Their steak is so juicy and well-spiced, makes me salivate even now. Is there enough for two there, by any chance?"

 (Huh?!?!)

 ME: "No Adeola, just enough for me. I didn't know I had to buy for the building as well as me. What did you want to talk about, nwanyi?! I'm tired and need to get to my apartment!"

 ADEOLA: Oh, sorry jare, my dear. I tend to get distracted a lot. My husband is always complaining about it. So embarrassing, I tell you. No vex, you hear? Okay, so we all got together over lunch and we all talked about you."

 

(Like seriously, what's new?)

 

ADEOLA: "We are all fascinated by your fabulous body and we see you go out in your car every saturday morning dressed for sports. We were wondering if we could entice you into joining all of us on a neighborhood jog every saturday starting at 6am. You seem to be the pro. You could teach us a thing or two"

 (FoodieNeighborBotheringMeSayWhatttt????)

 Me, jog? These women have got to be kidding me!!! Hahahahahaha!!!! Laugh no gree me. I practically choked laughing. This was a hilarious moment. Me, JOG????

 

Suffice it to say, I politely convinced her that I'm not the best running mate they could have. Abeg, I cannot shout! Hahahahahahaha!!! This is me laughing in a mix of chinese and abiriba!!! Jog kor, crawl ni!!!

 Okay, I'm off to actually get some work done to justify this month’s salary. I will be going to Sailors Lounge with some of my girls later this evening for FREEDOM HALL. Perfect evening to check out our LaS GiDi competition and drool over the hotties, but most importantly appreciate the arts!

Get out there, kiss someone random, drink some vodka... Have some fun!!

 

Bisous, XoXo

 

MIZ

The Reign of the "Tus", A Blog-Terview, A Blog Baton & A Grateful Miz!TOIN!!!!!!

I have been away for  far too long and I know this. Gosh, I missed gisting with you!!! That was one break too long!!!

Hi darlings!!!

Today has been quite hilarious through no fault of its own but for an odd quirk of fate and its insane sense of humor!
I met 4 guys at different times and in different places with the names: Sixtus, Quintus, Erastus, and wait for it... JUVENTUS!!!
Now let me describe them...

SIXTUS: Tall, fat, full facial beard, serious bow leg and pearly-white teeth.
QUINTUS: short, fat, bald head, droopy shoulders and slimy lips.
ERASTUS: short, reed-thin, bushy moustache, permed/ jerry-curled hair, beady eyes, thin smile.
JUVENTUS: tall, well-built, broad-shoulders, extra-large feet, Peter-rabbit teeth, K-legs, nice fingers, yellowing teeth with constant spittle flights... ermm... ewww???

Now close your eyes, imagine them individually. Then picture them cock-sure and arrogant except for Juventus whose shyness can save Africa and neighboring continents..
Definitely a day that had me laughing what with all 4 of them trying their hardest to hit on me. I guess this is an apology of sorts to them. I kept laughing and that was not fair, I think. hehehe

So, a baton was passed to me by Lisa Bouchard and I am to tell 11 random facts about me, answer 11 of her questions, then ask 11 other bloggers 11 questions.
Well, here goes:

11 Random Facts About Me
A) I am addicted to coffee (black/creamed)
B) I am a hopeful Romantic
C) I once owned a monkey my siblings and I named "Bobby"
D) I hate horror movies
E) I have some serious OCD
F) I love bananas and plantains
G) I have an incurable sweet tooth
H) I was considered a nerd in high school
I) I sometimes perform live shows to my stuffed animals and my pet "baby. I "sing" like Whitney, "dance" like Shakira, and of course, I applaud myself with a glass of champagne!
J) I have always believed in Labels/ Brands. they became that for a reason, after-all. So, if it isn't a Manolo Blahnik, forget it!! I won't do a plain Jane.
K) The only exercise I do is to clean my home but I have an active gym membership and I show up every saturday!!! money no go waste na!

There you have it!!! 11 random facts about moi!!! On to Lisa's questions, hehehe. Enjoy darlings!

What is the most expensive thing you’ve ever purchased that you didn’t need?
A: A power-bike
Where would you go in the event of a zombie apocalypse?
A: church! Lol
What is the most embarrassing thing you’ve ever named a pet?
A: Chuckles. I loved that dog of mine. It was so clumsy
Karaoke: fun bar experience or the demise of modern society?
A: absolutely fun experience!!! I sing like a toad with a bone stuck in its throat
Describe your ideal vacation.
A: white sand, blue seas, cool breezes, cocktails, large malls, bliss...
What’s your favorite thing to learn about and why?
A: I actually enjoy learning about nature. New things everyday that simply amaze me!
Heels or flats?
A: Definitely heels!! The higher the better.
What’s your favorite game?
A: Under-pressure/ Puzzles
How many books do you read in a year?
A: I keep reading. I never stop. No specific number
What is your favorite alcoholic drink?
A: I love my mojitos!!
Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?
A: Closed. I have a walk-in closet and I do not like open doors while I sleep.

And on to MY questions that I will pass on to 11 bloggers...

• 1) What can freak you out absolutely?
• 2) Who do you consider the biggest fashion brand ever?
• 3) How would you describe your sense of humor?
• 4) What motivates you?
• 5) Knicker-briefs or thongs?
• 6) Politics/ Religion: which would you rather discuss for a heated argument?
• 7) What good deed have you done lately?
• 8) Are you a fun person? Seriously.
• 9) Are you emotionally expressive?
• 10) Are you bored yet?
• 11) What does your closet say about you?

Woo-hoo!!!! I cannot wait to see all the answers. I'm passing this baton to:

a) TOINLICIOUS
b) SHEILA SPEAKS
c) LOLA-X
d) BWNG
e) SISI YEMMIE
f) John Doe
g) Lady Ngo
h) Agirlshouldbetwothings
i) ROLEX RELEASE
j) Aeedeeaee
k) Miss pf







Bisous mi darlings,

XoXo,

MIZ